Where is Home?

*by Linda Warren*

When I was escaping from my mother's house, she must have known that something was up. I was gradually moving my stuff out over a period of three days, traumatized and scared out of my mind.
She said to me, "Once you leave, you can never go home again." I thought to my self--that is not a threat. Who would want to come back to living HERE?
As I recovered from my experiences under her roof, her statement took on a new meaning for me. Perhaps it was unintended on her part, I don't know. I came to know that nothing is ever the same after leaving it.
Leaving my mother's house gave me unexpected power. I was no longer subject to her rages. I could choose when to communicate with her and when not to. I could keep myself safe.
Many years have passed since that time. Many years ago, I lived in Baton Rouge Louisiana for about eight or nine months. Gas was cheap then. My stomping grounds ranged from eastern Texas through Mobile Alabama to Picayune and Biloxi Mississippi. Friends and I visited New Orleans practically weekly.
Now the hurricane has leveled the city. New Orleans will remain in my memory golden bright and shining like the sun.
The places I have known that I have called home have all changed. It is true. I can never go home again. It is not just the places that have changed. I have changed too.
So just where is home? Home is where I am now. Home, like safety, comes from within.

-sapphoq

Falling off the tree 9/2/05

When I was working, I too spent alot of time trying to prevent myself from falling off of the tree. Now that I am not working, I have been thinking about these things and re-evaluating my life.
To me, it appears that many companies want fewer workers to do more and more things with less and less time and resources. There is a gross lack of balance in this way of thinking.
The bottom line for business is profit. When I do return to work, I intend to keep my priorities up front in spite of the mad rush around me. Profit will not be had at my expense. I can no longer afford to prioritize my health and well-being somewhere below the idea of working far more hours than is good for me. I will have balance in my life. I deserve no less.
I used to be one of those people rushing around madly, working far more than thirty-five hours a week on a salaried job. There was way too much to do. Working was like juggling plates. I never knew how many of those plates would crash.
After my car wreck, I was no longer useful to my company. During the time when I was sleeping twenty hours a day, someone kept calling me from the office to argue about completing a company accident report. I was unable to fill out any forms. I was suffering from altered consciousness and sent all paperwork to my attorney.
I had hit a house. I was very fortunate to be alive. I had a serious brain injury. I had spinal injuries. I didn't know what was going on. I felt like I no longer understood the world and someone wanted me to fill out paperwork. BUSINESS IS BUSINESS. I know now that she was "just doing her job" but that does not make the company's non-response to my accident any easier for me to take.

-sapphoq

Witch Hunts

*crystallogy web of human genome-from the human genome project*

No more witch hunts.
We resist.

From "La Cage aux Folles"

I am what I am and what I am needs no excuses.

I deal my own deck.

Sometimes the ace. Sometimes the deuces.

It's my world that I want to have a little pride in.

My world that I want to have no need to hide in.

Life's not worth a damn

Til you can say, "Hey world, I am what I am."

Why is it that we are so afraid of who we are? We are all human beings trying to live together on this one battered planet--hopefully without killing each other off.

-sapphoq