Wednesday, November 22, 2006
"Pop, what are you talking about," the son screams.
"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,"the old man says. "We're sick and tired of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."
And he hangs up.
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone."Like Heck they're getting a divorce, she shouts.
"I'll take care of this."
She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at the old man, "You are NOT getting divorced! Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" And she hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone, smiles and turns to his wife. "They're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."
Thanks to Ida for sending me this here joke.
Happy Turkey Day
to everyone but the turkeys.
To the vegans and vegetarians--
Happy Un-Turkey Day!
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone else who may be having a crumby day and kneads it .
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Poets, five are selected.
A toxic emphasis creates experience.
Surprize! Faculty say, "Produce!"
"Formula!" "Tastes!" "Models!"
Rankings are silly. Nobody nice
published me. Artistic prestige
isn't a guarantee. Teaching buys
little art. I get it. [I get it.] I do.
sapphoq n friends reminds you that found poems are taken from words on page or pages written by others and thus is not copyrightable to the one who "found" the poem.