I got a glossy insert in the mail that claimed I'd won a prize. It was a scratch-off thing: a series of three boxes. Two read "25,000 dollars." The middle one was what the
Underneath all of that was a guarantee that everyone would win one of four prizes: 25,000K, 750 dollar gift card to a local outlet of a big chain department store, some dollar gold coins ranging from 3 on up to 100, and one dollar gold coin. The prize depended upon which set of numbers I had on the insert. Having a bit of time before dinner, I went down to the mall where these used car salesmen [there were no saleswomen there] were. I'd never seen that particular rip-off technique in action and I was curious.
A young man met me at the door. He immediately brought me over to a table and handed me a form to fill you. "You have to register," he said. I asked why and he replied some hogwash about knowing who came. "So where is the poster with the number that shows my prize?" I asked. The young man frantically tried to get me to sit in the chair and fill out the form first. I looked around. "Oh, there the poster is!" and I walked over to it. I had "won" three dollars in gold coins.
I stalked back to the table and I surveyed the "registration form." The form wanted my name, address, phone numbers, employer, if I owned a house-- a bit too nosy for a "registration form," I thought. I spied something after my required signature on the bottom. By signing, I was giving the company permission to pull up my credit report [to see if I was "eligible" for a "special program" in addition to getting a loan to buy one of the very polished used cars outside]. "Uh, no," I said, confiscating the pen and the form. Then I walked out.
On her way in was a woman clutching an identical glossy insert. "Oh, you got one of them too?" I greeted her. "You got the same number I did. Your prize is three one-dollar gold coins. And they are going to ask your permission to get your credit report. It's a rip-off," I said. The woman smiled feebly at me, "Well, yeah," and she backed away from me toward the door. Hey, it's [currently] a free country. Maybe she wanted to buy a car from these people. These people were not even from the neighborhood. The mailing was from another state. There was a total of four used cars outside. And the pen that I stole had the name of yet another mall on it about four hours away.
Spam-- full of "multitudinal" variations.
sapphoq and friends